Really, Really Bummed

Let me tell you about my OB doctor, Dr. Gaiser.  She is AMAZING!  I have been nothing but happy with her and her practice.  She was there every step of the way through my pregnancy with Kate and was even there to deliver her.  She has been here every step of the way through this pregnancy so far.  I am completely comfortable with her, so I feel like I can ask her anything.  She also really listens to me when I am there with her.  It has never felt like I am "just a patient" and she is in a rush to see the next person.  She has always given me her undivided attention and whether or not she has the time, she has always made me feel like she has all day to talk to me.  I love this.  Sometimes when I'm going through the unknown, just having that person to reassure me that everything is ok makes me feel better.  This is who she is to me.  She has comforted me in the times that I have struggled being pregnant and reassured me that what I am going through or have gone through is normal.

Most of all, I feel like she knows me.  I feel like she has my best interest and she allows me to help make decisions on what is best for my body and my pregnancy.  She is a doctor that allows us to be in it together.  And, quite frankly, I feel like my baby and I are in perfectly good hands when I'm with her.  She is a wonderful doctor and I consider myself lucky to be a part of her practice.

Well, the other day I received a phone call from her practice.  They told me that my doctor, the one who I've grown to know and love over the last three plus years, has to go on medical leave herself...Um, excuse me?!  MY doctor?  Yes, my doctor, and she won't be back until July 14th so I needed to re-schedule all of my last appointments with a new doctor.  Reminder, we are due July 16th...

What the what?!  Seriously?  I may or may not have started crying after this phone call.  There is nothing I can do about this.  And, honestly, I just hope that my doctor is ok, not for me, but for her and her family because she is such a wonderful person.  But I can't help but feel really, really bummed that my last month and half of this pregnancy I will be with someone completely new.  Someone I will have to retell my story to.  Someone I will have to leave my trust in.  Someone I will have to rely on that I don't even know during the most critical time in my pregnancy.

Quite frankly, I just don't know if I have the energy to do this.

I had my first appointment today with this new doctor.  She was also very nice.  From what I understand, all of the doctors in the practice are pretty awesome.  But there's a part of me that just wants my doctor back.  I want that safety net.  I need that comfort zone.  I swear little sister is coming early, so in my head I'm not going to be seeing my doctor until all is said and done.  (I swear this because I already feel cramping in my lower abdomen and I didn't experience that at all this early with Kate.)

I tried my best to put on a happy face today.  I keep telling myself that this new doctor is more than capable and my baby and I are still in good hands.  I didn't gain much weight since the last appointment, , surprising based on the last few appointments, and our little lady's heartbeat is right on target.  We are measuring at 32 weeks and we are at 33 weeks.

I'm going to do my best to make the best of this situation.  There's no guarantee, after all, that my doctor would even be there for delivery anyway.  Everything happens for a reason and I trust that this is the same situation.

Ok, end rant.

Looky there.  At least I took a bump photo this week.
It only took me...33 weeks...

Eight More Weeks

We are 32 weeks pregnant which means in more or less than 8 short weeks we will be meeting our newest little lady!  We still are unsure of what name this little one has but we are getting her room together and trying to get situated so that we will be prepared as best as we can for her arrival!

All went very well at my appointment last week.  I put on another couple of pounds since the last check-up and our little bambino's heart beat is right on target.  I received a call shortly after my last appointment where I was test for gestational diabetes and was asked to start taking iron pills again.  I had to do this when I was pregnant with Kate, so no surprise here.  Perhaps I will be able to stay up a bit later now?!

Since we've yet to do official bump photos, I will leave you with this gem that I found on my phone from Kate.  Leave it to Kate to capture the details I am too tired to capture!

Week 32 bump!

And, yes, it's really real.  We are growing a baby over here and here's the bump to prove it!

33 Years Old

Yesterday I turned 33!  Life has never been better.  Each year it continues to just get better and better and it amazes me.  I am so thankful to have the people I do in my life.  I'm thankful for my health and my family and my friends.  And I am especially thankful to be a Mommy to a most beautiful and intelligent little girl.

At 33, I thought it might be fun to record a little snapshot of my life right now.  After all, it is always changing.

I get up around 5:45-6:00 am.  I quickly shower, hopefully grab a bite to eat, and try to be out the door by 6:30 am to get to work around 7:00 am.  Kate is usually still sleeping when I leave so I don't typically get to see her in the morning.

I work at a landscape company on the irrigation team in an analyst role and am extremely proud of the part that I have played on my team.  I have been with this company for nearly four years and have been happier doing what I am doing than any other role that I have been in here.  While it still is not my dream job (does anyone know what that is?!), it is a job that helps get the bills paid and allows us to live the life that we enjoy.

I work from 7:00 am to 4:00 pm and then head directly over to daycare to pick up Kate.  I typically get to her around 4:30-4:40 pm and no matter what kind of day I've had, she is the light that always makes it brighter.  I am always my happiest when I'm with her.

She and I typically get home around 5:00 pm and I start dinner or at least figuring out dinner.  We try to eat around 5:30 pm-6:00 pm.

Recently, we have been staying up way later than normal, with the nice weather and what not, but typically we play/walk/go to the park, then take a bath at 7:00-7:15 pm-ish, then it's books and bed for Kate.

I, however, am also expecting Baby #2 - little sister - so most nights when I put Kate to bed, I fall asleep too and just stay in there with her.  (Sorry, Bri.)  I know these moments are fleeting, and judge me if you will for sleeping with my 2.5 year old daughter, but I don't care.  I love it.  She loves it.  We both get a good nights sleep, and we won't be sleeping in the same bed forever.  For the record, we take baths a lot together too.  Sometimes it's just easier that way.  And I imagine once little sister is old enough to bathe without an infant seat, she and Kate and perhaps I will take baths together too.  There's nothing wrong with either of those.

In terms of life in general, I feel really behind.  I joke that I've felt behind since Kate was born, but that is literally the truth.  I'm behind on our blog, which I am really sad about, behind on craft projects that I want to complete, behind on videos that I want to create, behind on gifts I want to make for family members, behind on household chores, and laundry, and meal planning.  I have had a hard time finding the time to do those things because I always want to spend my free time with Kate more, and I don't want her to be sitting next to me, bored out of her little mind, while I type away at a computer or edit a video or search for recipes.  I hope to get caught up somehow, someway, sometime soon.  At least get caught up on our blog.  That is what upsets me the most about being behind - I forget the little details of the moments I so eagerly want to remember when I back date my posts a couple months back...  [Insert sad face here.]

At 33, I know I don't have it all figured out.  I have my moments of despair, self consciousness, doubt, frustration, and anger, but I know a heck of  a lot more and am a heck of a lot more confident than even just 1 year ago.

My biggest fear is dying young.  I don't want to leave my babies.  I know they will always be my babies, but I don't want them growing up without their Mommy.  I don't think there will ever be a "good" time to leave my babies, but I hope and pray that I live a long, happy, healthy, fulfilled life, and I trust that there is a plan for me.

My biggest hope is happiness.  It is elusive, but not impossible.  And it is up to me.  I want to be happy to teach my girls how to be happy at a much younger age than I learned it.  I want to be happy to live a fulfilled life.  I want to be happy for my husband.  I want to be happy for family and friendships and hardships.  I want to be happy for me.  It is a lot easier said than done.  It is a conscious effort that I must mentally remind myself about.  I have grown a lot, learned a lot about myself and am proud of the person I have become in the last 33 years, but I am not perfect and I know there is still room for improvement.

At 33, I've learned that I sometimes need to let it go.  Despite all Frozen references, it really is a good motto and I have adopted it as mine.  I've even thought of getting a bracelet engraved with "let it go" to wear proudly as a reminder!  I've yet to do this, but I've looked into it!  A subtle reminder couldn't hurt.

My favorite cake is still strawberry shortcake.

I am simple.  The little things in life inspire me more than anything else.  I love being outside and spend every chance I can out there.  I love being a Mom more than anything in the world.  And I love Kate even more than that.

I never knew I'd end up in Ohio, but, at 33, that is where I live with Brian, Kate, our dog - Jack, and soon to be little sister too.  I contemplate what it would be like living in Maryland again, and even I don't know if I want to be back there.  I miss my family, but I left for many reasons.  Now I have my own family to consider and Ohio seems to have more pluses than Maryland when I think about it.

I am 33 years old.  And I've also learned that some of my favorite photos of Kate and I are taken on my birthday:

33 years old, officially!  And a strawberry shortcake!
Love.

I still have room to grow, to learn, to become a better wife, mother, daughter, sister, friend, but each year I continue to grow closer to finding happiness, my happiness.  And each year, I am thankful for that.

[End birthday rant.]

Strep Throat - Part II: One Day

It's amazing the difference that one day makes.  Yesterday, I picked Kate up from school early because the school had called me and said she was running a fever and was very lethargic and tired.  They said she was literally just lying on the floor instead of playing with her friends and doing the planned activities.  This is extremely unlike Kate.

My poor baby, and back in a pull-up despite being diaper free for weeks...

Even when she's sick she's cute!

And this one just had to get in on the cuddles too.
#spoiledrotten

When I got her home I called the pediatrician and got her in that afternoon.  I thought it was strange that her symptoms appeared so rapidly so I wanted to be sure it wasn't something more serious.  Low and behold, our darling girl picked up strep throat somewhere, and she was placed on antibiotics.

Just one day later though and she was almost back to her normal self!  We spent the day at home together because she was not permitted to be back at school for 24 hours, so we relaxed, watched movies, and played with toys!

Breakfast next to Mommy while I did a teensy
bit of work!

The animation in the next several shots kills me!

It is SO Kate!

She's got a little sparkle in her eye!

No doubt asking me if she should or should not do something...

And clearly I told her that wouldn't be a good idea.

But she probably did it anyway...

And then wanted to see herself doing it!
#theclaw

After having strep throat recently, I knew the amount of pain she was feeling and I was amazed at how quickly the antibiotics kicked in.  I am so happy that my baby is feeling better again!

Kate's Color Clips

I recently saw a cute color clip idea that promotes matching and learning shades of colors in addition to just learning the color.  For example, you know what color purple is, but do you know what color light purple is and what dark purple is?!  Exactly.  Since Kate already knows all of her colors really well, I thought it would be good to take our color learning to the next level!  And so this prompted our color clips!

I picked out two sets of colors to see which would work better.

I ended up selecting the light set of colors because I thought they
showed more of a contrast.  Also because there were three color
choices which would allow me to say LIGHT PINK, PINK, and
DARK PINK if we ever decided to label them.

I cut small strips from both sides of the color swatches to get these
little strips of color.

Kate was so intrigued by the paper cutter!

So, much to Brian's dismay, I let her have a go.
She's gotta learn sometime, right?  And she was under
complete supervision.

She did such a good job!

And then we decided to fling all of our newly cut bits and pieces
of paper on the floor.

Nothing that a broom won't fix!

While paper was being strewn across the floor, and
the paper cutter was put away, I cut two small strips of
color for each side of the clothes pin.

And then I hot glued them to the clothes pins!

Put that process on repeat and you've got yourselves a complete
set of color clips!

I ended up laminating ours with some laminating paper we had
lying around.  I thought the lamination finished these off quite nicely
and my hope is they last longer too!

We have yet to officially learn with these color clips, but I will be sure to let you know if they are a hit or miss in our household once we do!

Gardening Goddess

We embarked on getting our garden planted this week/weekend.  Over the week, Kate (and Jack) and I took an evening and weeded the garden.

Everyone gardens in pink fairy wings, right?!

And uses pink garden tools, right?

Yes, that's right.

She is my little Gardening Goddess.

Then all 3.5 of us hopped in the car and headed over to Strader's Nursery to pick up some herbs and veggies.  We decided on three tomato plants: cherry, beefsteak, and roma, pepperocini peppers, zucchini, cucumber, watermelon, and basil.

Our tomatoes did not do well last summer.  It was relatively cool for the summer so I'm thinking that may have been the problem.  We didn't get any regular tomatoes and only had a few good cherry tomatoes.  Kate LOVED picking the cherry tomatoes off last summer and eating them right in the garden!  I imagine the same will go this summer if our garden starts producing!  And this may or may not be one of the main reasons I wanted to plant more tomatoes!

Weeded and ready!

My little helper left her wings inside but adorned herself with
Frozen boots!

1-2-3 - Cheese!

First we laid all of our plants out.

Then we planted them!

And surrounded the garden with marigolds which I have read help
to keep the little critters out!

Also, just a couple of weeks ago we painted some pots to plant some sunflower seeds in.  I figured since we were already good and dirty that now might be a good time to plant said sunflower seeds.  I brought out the bag of potting soil and asked Kate to help fill her pots.

I love this!  Kate did an awesome job.

I, on the other hand, completely over-watered
all of the pots by blasting them with water from
the hose there laying on the ground.  This includes
knocking one completely off the table and breaking
it.  #momfail

We may hold off on our sunflower seed experiment
until next year.

By the end we were both covered in dirt and soil, so baths and showers ensued immediately.  We got nice and clean and reveled in our newly planted garden (and shelved the sunflower experiment).  I certainly hope we see the fruits of our labor this season!

#hashtageight

#bedtime  #notinterested  #stankface  #poutperfected
#yetstillsocute

#katepickedheroutfit  #allpink  #allgirl  #alltutu
#andsnowboots  #youcantforgetthesnowboots
#adorable

#wesawthedustinthelight  #itwassparkling  #wehadtotouchit
#itwasmagic  #dustmagic

#earlymorning  #cuddles  #toobrightforthedog  #thatsbright

#thatface  #myheartmelts  #soinnocent  #nevergrowup
#andpleaseignorethetears  #itriedtowashthecarseatcover
#ifailed

#shewantedtosobad  #therearesomanygerms  #ialwaysdontwantto
#igaveintoday  #shelovedit  #ihitsomanydisplays  #firsttime

Post Bath Walk

Kate and I have been taking many-a-walks recently!  I imagine these will only continue with the weather becoming so nice and summer on the horizon!  Tonight we decided to take a little walk after our bath.  I let Kate call all the shots until it was time to head back home.  I gave her the options we had at hand: going straight, left or right.  Unless we were headed back to the house where she got the options that would lead us home.

Looks like our next turn is RIGHT!

And then STRAIGHT!

And then LEFT!

We had a blast and it was such a nice night to get out!  Plus we got to hone in on our DIRECTION skills!  #learningisfun

M-O-M & Mini Carts

Kate and I flew back into town from Maryland yesterday.  I took Monday off and we spent the day getting organized from our trip and running a few errands.  One of these errands was a stop at Trader Joe's.  When we walked in, we saw pint sized carts for pint sized people and our pint sized Kate just had to push one!

Crackers?  Yes, please!

Girlfriend is on a mission!

She's a pro!  All grocery stores should have these!

She was super excited to help and we diligently picked out things that we needed that we could put in her cart.  She LOVED this!  And it was so much fun to see how excited she was!  I love spending these special days together!

On another note, as the post title suggests, last Mother's Day, Brian presented me with this gem and framed it:

2014.

This Mother's Day, I received an updated one and fell even more in love with it:

2015.

I mentioned I see a tradition budding and he just gave me a little smirk as if to leave me with a maybe, maybe not answer.  So Brian.  It's crazy to see how much Kate has grown in one year.  It's also crazy to think that next Mother's Day there will be two little girlies that call me Mama.

This thought just melts my heart and I seriously hope the tradition continues.

(Side note: To this day I have no clue where Brian keeps these wooden letters.  He has hidden them in our house somewhere and busts them out once a year...)